Through My Eyes – Jess B.

Through My Eyes – Jess B.

What mental health concerns have you come up against? Are they yours or a family members?

I have lived with depression since I was about 13 and anxiety since childhood. I have also experienced PND after the birth of my first child.

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Lunchboxes, lollies, and learning

Lunchboxes, lollies, and learning

I just bought more expensive, healthier yoghurt pouches that I really can’t afford and I told my kids they can’t eat them.

I know, I know, you’re all like ‘uh Carmen, why did you buy them if they can’t eat them?’ Let me tell you!

It is because #biggestlittle starts pre-school on Monday and I’m already bracing myself for the lunchbox guilt.

We are a relatively healthy household. In June last year we cut out most of the basic junk from our lives (sweets, soft drink etc) and since then we’ve made additional tweaks here and there to hit that next level ‘healthy home’ – swapping regular flour for coconut or almond flour, giving sugar the flick, making spreads from scratch, actually making everything from scratch when we can.

But seeing some of the supermum lunch boxes that kids get these days has me feeling a little low.

Homemade Nutella

I don’t even know why I’m panicking. Possibly (read: definitely) because of old mate anxiety. Our kids usually choose tomoatoes over lollies, they’ve never had soft drink, and they live for the free fruit basket at Woolies. There’s really not a big adjustment to be made. But that nasty little voice in my head is telling me it’s not enough.

Homemade Strawberry and Raspberry Gummy Lollies

Please don’t think that I’m sitting here all holier than thou looking down on others who choose to do things differently. No, no, no. It took us a long time to get here, and we are far from perfect. The kids still get the occasional Maccas meal and spend Christmas getting hyped up and Boxing Day crashing down. Easter still involves chocolate (and yes supermarkets, I saw you stocking the shelves with brightly coloured foil covered animals whilst the garbage trucks were still straining under the weight of scrunched up wrapping paper and empty Shopkins blind bags), and birthdays are still all about the cake.

Santa was still digesting milk and cookies when these guys popped up

The point I’m trying to make is that we are a healthy home and I still feel incredible pressure to provide a very specific kind of tucker for the little tacker. I’ve been Youtubing, Googling, and Pintresting my fingers off. My most used words may now be ‘lunchbox’, ‘Sugar-free’, and ‘kids’ ( kids because otherwise I get a heap of mason jar salads perfect for the office!)

Lunch today – Zucchini slice packed full of veggies

I feel strongly that some of the pressure is good. No, seriously! Sometimes pressure is a good thing, because it makes me try harder. I strive to do better for my family. 

And other times it just makes me crumble. I break, and instead of trying my hardest to adapt I retreat, sometimes literally – jumping into my bed and assuming the foetal position.

We need to find the balance. Not everyone is in the same place and that’s ok, it’s not my life, not my children, not my circus. 

My monkeys enjoying their zucchini slice – even if it doesn’t look like they are *cough* middlelittle

Of course children should eat healthy, nutritious foods, we all know that, but we shouldn’t shame those who don’t have the same mindset. We are all on our own journey. Perhaps we could gently see if someone is open to advice while being careful not to have a condescending undertone, or we could share our advice to the public in a place they can see and leave it in their hands. 

My kids will have healthy lunch boxes majority of the time, but some days I just won’t have the energy to do anymore than a jam sandwich, an apple, and a biscuit and I shouldn’t have to feel guilty about that. No one should.

Strive to be healthy, cook together, make mistakes, try new things, and make sure you laugh while you do it – we’re making memories and creating lifelong connections with food here!

Speaking of making mistakes – this Orange and Carrot Cake is now preparing to be Orange and Carrot Bliss Balls. Don’t ask #rookiecook

The Simpsons say you don’t make friends with salad, perhaps it’s time we consider that Homer may not be the incredibly sexy, intelligent, healthy role model he was so clearly designed to be.

I don’t know about you, but I sure as heck want to be friends with the person who rocks up with this treasure chest!
Disclaimer, because internet – I am not saying that we should ever ignore situations where a child is actually being neglected. #commonsense #hopefullythatsobvious

Repetition and rewards

Repetition and rewards

I know, I know I’ve said this before, multiple times, but trust me, I’ll say it again.

Because this is important. It is an important topic. It is important that things change. 
I’m not saying go and share this blog post – I’m saying go and share this message.

Please.

How can you say no to that face? #smallestlittle

We need to stop using the phrase ‘boys will be boys’ as a way to shrug off rough behaviour. 
We need to end the saying ‘he hit you because he likes you’ to justify why a boy may be picking on someone.

We need to cease referring to only the sport-playing males as ‘a real boys boy.’ What about the little boys who prefer science, or dancing, or art? Are they any less of a boy?

We need to quit saying ‘stop crying like a little girl’ because every body cries. It’s not a weakness. It’s an emotion.

Why are we expecting bad behaviour from boys? How are we giving them a chance when these phrases are used so callously in every day language?

I have three sons. I do not want my boys growing up thinking that the only way to be classified as a real man is to be a footy-playing, violent, emotional desert of a human. It’s simply not the case and these words can be damaging.

#smallestlittle rocking a Zeke Unique shirt

An amazing lady by the name of Rachael has created a shirt in honour of me along these very lines! I feel so blessed that she has done something so kind. I got a lot of comments accusing me of brushing my sons roughness off as ‘boys will be boys’. There was little said that upset me more than that.

From the Zeke Unique Facebook page : “An awesome message to share… this tee has been made in honour of one of my favourite Mummy bloggers! The joys of 3 boys She’s real, she writes from the heart and she’s raising three AMAZING little men.” Yes, I’m blushing!

I expect more from my children. I expect more from myself as a mother. I would never. 

Anyway I’m not getting into that again #brokenrecord.

Rachael is the mind, body, and soul behind the business Zeke Unique. This new shirt is a part of her ‘Equali-Tees’ line – a line of shirts that celebrate the individual child and their likes, rather than what they are expected to like based on their gender at birth.

This little boy #middlelittle loves music!

I can’t speak highly enough of this whole thing! I’m so proud to know Rachael. I’m so proud to now have a shirt honouring me! I’m so proud of the change she is working towards. We all need to work towards the same outcome.

I got my #mumlife from Zeke Unique a few months back!

Let’s celebrate our children for the unique individuals that they are!

—-

I’d love to giveaway one of Zeke Unique’s new ‘Boys will be good humans’ t-shirts! If you’d like to win one just leave a comment either here, Facebook, or Instagram and tell me which awesome little guy in your life you’d love to see rocking this awesome shirt!

I wouldn’t hate it if you shot over to Zeke Unique and to my Facebook page and gave them a like either! 😉 

And of course you’d just be mean if you didn’t share the opportunity with your mates, right? 😏

Please note – I am receiving nothing from Zeke Unique for anything I’ve said except for Rachael’s continuous support of everything I do. I genuinely love her products and just wanted to share my joy over her new addition! 😊 #pinkypromise

*Open to residents of Australia. One nomination per person please, it’s already going to be hard enough to choose as it is. Maybe I’ll make someone else do that 😂 Entries close midnight AEST Thursday 26th of January 2017. Winner will be announced Friday 27th of January 2017.

It’s on like Donkey Kong

It’s on like Donkey Kong

Wow, well that was unexpected.

When I hit upload on my blog post ‘We’re under attack‘ the other day I had no idea what it would turn into! It seemed that the reply threads consisted of twenty-odd positive, supportive comments and then one that suggested my children were monsters. Twenty more ‘I feel you!’ comments, and one accusing me of shrugging my children playing up as ‘boys will be boys’ (I have never, and I will never). Another twenty comments sending love, and one telling me that my children targeted the little girl and had planned an attack on her – puh-lease.


I just refuse to believe that children are nasty little schemers with a plan for world domination and pulling peoples hair. Perhaps I’m naive. Either way, I know my children, and they definitely don’t have a bunker full of targets photos and playground blueprints.

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We’re under attack!

We’re under attack!

Today I was abused by another mother.

I’ve heard about this happening, but I’ve never been involved like this.

My middle son (2) hurt her daughter. I saw it happen, spoke to him about it, and then he and I both apologised to her daughter and her for what had happened. All was good. I felt good about how I’d dealt with it.

Then without warning she was in my face.

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A parent and a person

A parent and a person

This morning was the first childcare day of the year for Biggestlittle. We walked in at the same time as the staff who organises placements and she said hi and asked where the other two boys were. I reminded her that they only come on Mondays.

The glorious words that escaped her mouth changed everything. She said that I should bring them in because it was quiet and they missed out coming on Monday due to the public holiday!

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Memories and Milestones

Memories and Milestones

A lot has happened in the last few days. Santa has come and gone and is probably relaxing somewhere warm, hubby and I are exhausted, the kids are on a three day sugar high, and the house looks like a toy store went out for a big night, drank far too much tequila, and yakked in every room.

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You did what?!

You did what?!

Today a thing happened.

A thing that would probably be no biggie to the average person, but a thing that is kind of a big deal to me.

I smashed my phone. Yep, my beloved Note 5 is no more.

See what I’m saying – it’s a huge thing.

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From O to U and other conception induced catastrophes

From O to U and other conception induced catastrophes

Today Mister 3 was practising his writing.

He was attempting to write the word ‘mum’ after successfully completing his brothers name. M was easy because it starts his name and he’s pretty much got that one sorted.

The letter U was new to him, so he needed some help. “It’s like a little bucket” I said to him, trying to make it relatable. The next words he said made me laugh and cringe at the same time.

“Look mummy, it looks like your boobies”.

Brilliant.

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